As much as our hearts will break when this sweet boy leaves we have had to change our perspective. A friend who is a foster parent really helped us to see it in a new light. She told us that when a child leaves we have fulfilled what they needed and there is another child who needs us more. This really helped me to view the situation differently. This sweet boy will take a piece of my heart with him and I will never forget the joy that he has brought to my life but it's encouraging to know that when he leaves, I have fulfilled my purpose in his life.
Through my ugly cries that seemed to randomly happen, a lot of prayer occurred. I prayed for guidance, clarity, and time. Two extra days off this week has allowed me more time to continue to snuggle this precious gift. While listening to our worship songs, I was a mess. I was angry because all along I have prayed for my heart to be guarded and it wasn't, I was sad because he has become such a part of my life and I don't want him to leave, I was frustrated because we have been told so many different things and more than all of those feelings, I was just heartbroken. This song by Josh Wilson began to play and I knew God was speaking directly to me.
Isn't our God awesome? He is always with us even when we feel alone. I have heard this song before but it took on a whole new meaning. I was reminded that it's in His time, not ours. We have to keep our faith and continue to trust.
Sweet cousin time!
Snuggling with my chunky monkey…nothing greater!
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