Life Changing

One year ago I sat on my couch folding laundry and said a simple prayer, "Dear Lord, we just got approved to get a placement, if You're going to send us a child today would be a great day! We are home for a snow day and we are off on Monday. " One hour late my phone rang and it was a number I did not recognize. I yelled, "This could be them!" My heart was beating out of my chest, my hands were shaking, and I didn't know if I would be able to speak. The person I spoke to asked if we would take a placement and before she even finished her sentence I said "YES!" very enthusiastically. She told me to be at the hospital at 3:30 to pick up a four day old baby boy. Four days old? Everyone told me that it is very unlikely to get a newborn. We were a nervous wreck. We cried, we walked in circles trying to figure out what we needed to do, we made a list and more than all of that, we just prayed. We had no idea what we were doing or what to expect but we were so excited. 

We had the longest day waiting for 3:30. We would look at the clock and it would seem like an eternity so we would check again and it would be just a few minutes later. When it was finally time to go to the hospital we were a mess. We were shaky, crying, antsy, a bundle of emotions all in one. The nurse had us wash our hands and walk back to his room. Through the window we could see a tiny baby bundled up in a blanket, that was my baby! I was officially a momma. We were parents! I could not wait to pick up the 6 pound 2 ounce gift God had just blessed us with. I'm not going to lie, several times throughout the day I wondered what we had gotten ourselves into. We had no idea what we were doing and now we were taking someone else's child into our home. We knew we were fulfilling God's purpose for us and we had to trust Him.

Since bringing home that sweet bundled up baby our lives have changed drastically. We sleep less, we do tons more laundry, our house is always a mess, but we are happier and more fulfilled then we ever thought possible. I never knew being a momma would be as amazing as it is. There are challenging days but his sweet smile, hugs, and kisses make the worst days perfect. When my sweet boy walks towards me reaching his sweet chubby hands to me, my heart melts. I tell him every day that I couldn't have picked a better boy if I would have been given the chance. We thank God every single day for choosing us to be his parents. He is the biggest blessing in our lives. I would go through the anxiety, heart break, fear, and sadness a million times over just to be his momma again. 

The possibility of adoption makes this day even more special. There were so many times I thought he would be going home and my heart shattered. Some days I cried more than I smiled. Today, I am crying as I write this but not out of fear, out of joy, happiness, and thanksgiving. He is my baby, my sweet boy, and thought of knowing that he may legally be mine makes me feel like I could explode. 

It amazes me how God uses us and we don't understand. We question God and the things that are happening but we can't see the big picture. We put our trust and our faith in him and at times it was the hardest thing to do. I'm so thankful to serve such an Almighty God!

*Thank you for everyone who prayed for his ear tube procedure. Unfortunately, due to his congestion and cough they felt it would be better to wait. We are praying he is well enough next time so he can get some relief!